Leo, Wow, life is crazy right now. I feel so close to God in one way and so far away at the same time. Does that make sense? It’s like, I fully trust in Gods plan, but I don’t feel him working in me the same way I used to. It’s probably just me ignoring […]

Leo, I’m so lost. I’m so confused, overwhelmed, and just complicated. My emotions are so mixed up right now. I miss you and I wish you were still here. Today, your dad’s cousin had her second baby. We are so thrilled for them. It reminds me of bringing Lily home from the hospital. I saw […]

Leo, I’m sitting here next to your grave right now…feeling completely lost, devoid of purpose, and running low on self worth. Losing you was impossible, losing my dad made it even harder. Have you ever heard someone say “infinity plus one”? That’s how I’m feeling. It seems ridiculous to think you can add 1 to […]

Leo, It’s been a while since I’ve written to you. I hope you know that I haven’t forgotten about you…the reason I haven’t written is actually quite the opposite. On 6/20/13, your Papa Augie, my dad, passed away. You already know this, I’m sure. I am feeling numb right now. First my son, then my […]

4/12/13 7:48am Dear Leo, I woke up today so sad that you were not in bed next to me. I wanted to reach out and hug you, smile at you, kiss your sweet warm baby cheeks, and give you breast milk as we doze in and out of sleep; just like we did every day […]

Leo, I saw your picture today at work and it hit me hard…you’re really gone.  Nobody is going to knock on my door or call me to say that you’re back; that there was a cure; that this didn’t really happen.  It’s really over and my heart is hurting so badly.  I know that you’re […]

Dear Leo, Sometimes I find myself feeling so dizzy. I think that the stress of losing you, of watching over your sisters extra carefully, of waiting for a final cause of death, of mourning, is getting to me physically. There are days when I just can’t stop crying and I literally cry all day long. […]

Leo, I was just talking with a coworker who was kind enough to pray with me today. I told him how a piece of me died the day that you died. After he left my office, a picture of you, your sisters, and your dad in my bed, looks so happy. And that’s when I […]

Leo, Alyssa told me about a dream she had of you. After a really long and difficult day, this story was like a cold drink of water…refreshing and quenching. She said that she dreamed of you and that you said, “Don’t worry about me Alyssa, I’m with God now. And also, a new baby is […]

Leo, Today is one of the hardest days I’ve had. I woke up this morning and your dad was questioning himself all over again; “Was it my fault? Could I have been responsible for your death? Was it “overlay”? I know I wasn’t on top of the baby, but I doubt myself.“ God, that is […]