May 28, 2013 4:38 pm Leo, I cannot believe that I have made it this far without you. You inspire my faith in God, and in turn, my faith gives me strength. I am a different person than the mom that you left behind a month and a half ago. I am more loving, kind, […]


I walk around everyday with this incredible pain inside my chest. My heart is the epicenter of the pain and it radiates to the top of my head, to the tips of my fingers, to the heels of my feet, and everywhere inbetween. I smile because I know that I’m supposed to. I laugh, because […]


Leo, Your dad and I took a walk along the beach this morning. It was so peaceful and uplifting. As we were walking, I noticed a little white shorebird that looked a lot like a small white crane. There were three of them, which is awesome because you seem to have this theme with the […]

SIDS clinical study

Leo, Today a new sids study was published and it states that babies who sleep with their moms and dads are 5x more likely to die of sids even if they are breast feed and the parents don’t smoke or do drugs. At first I thought, okay cool, new info. After I read the study, […]

Choosing a cemetery

Leo, Happy two month old birthday. I thought I would share the story of how your dad and I chose your burial site. Maybe one day my words will help another grieving family. After you died and we had to leave the hospital without you, your dad and I were devastated and so confused. We […]


Hi Leo, Today is a really hard day for me and I’m not so sure why. I could not sleep last night despite my best efforts. I am overwhelmed by sadness and stress. The sadness, I get. The stress, though…? I have put my trust in God and I know that he has a plan […]

Remembering you

May 14, 2013 6:50pm Hi Leo, I’m here at La Vista sitting next to your grave. I miss you so much. Last night, Alyssa told me that she didn’t remember what you looked like. So I decided to show her and Lily some videos of you. God, that was so hard to do. I miss […]

Back to work

Leo, Today was my first day back to work since my maternity leave began in February. Driving in, I posted on Facebook and prayed for god to give me strength and grace today. Driving into the parking lot, I almost had a panic attack. My heart was racing, my palms were sweating, and I was […]

Without you

May 11, 2013 4:40 pm My Leo, I’m feeling so sad right now. It’s Mother’s Day weekend and you’re not here with me. This sucks. I should not be at this wedding today. I should have you with me right now. I should be worried about how to handle this situation that Zach and I […]

Missing you

Leo, Tonight I found myself sobbing again. That’s three times this week that I found myself absolutely inconsolable. I love you so much. You were supposed to be here with me. I’m supposed to watch you grow old. I’m so glad that you’re in heaven and aren’t in any pain, but that doesn’t take my […]